Something that Josh and I
discussed prior to our marriage was how we wanted our faith to be incorporated
in our life together. We decided to do a weekly Bible Study together so that we
can reflect on our relationship and focus on God. So within the first week of
being married we ordered our first “newly married series” to go through and
since we are still awaiting its arrival, we went to the internet for an article
or video to get ourselves started.
While searching the web
for a place to start, Josh stumbled upon two links (which I will include at the
end of this post, this is simply my experience with these articles). The first
one we explored was “The Seven Greatest Needs of a Wife.”
It was so amazing to sit
with my husband and go through the list and really discuss each of the needs
mentioned. The seven needs are: love, attention, protection, security, value,
compassion, and partnership.
Now I am blessed with an
amazing husband who truly fulfills these needs for me, but the way the author
of the article breaks down each need really opened up his eyes to how my brain
works and gave him ideas to meet the needs differently too. It also taught me
ways to communicate the specifics of each need I have.
For example, the
partnership need is a big one for me. I like to do “girly” things: visit craft
stores, shop, etc., which Josh does not enjoy but I would love him join me.
When we read the section about partnership Josh really realized that when I ask
him to be present doing the little things I like, it means a lot.
The next article was, “7
of the Greatest Needs of a Man.” Which honestly kind of hit me right between
the eyes. I knew that being a new wife would mean that I needed to work on
things, but man did I not realize how much!
The 7 needs listed are:
respect, admiration, tranquility, commitment, acceptance/participation, ability
to lead, and emotional release.
The respect and admiration
needs I like to think I am a champ at and according to the way the author broke
it down, I’m pretty close to being on point. Unfortunately, I fall short in
other areas.
As the wife, I have a huge
responsibility to my husband and the way I handle things greatly impacts him.
The need he has of tranquility is honestly not easy for me. The explanation
really hits on nagging, which I know I have fallen into the trap of before. My
nagging takes away from his time and ability to prepare to face the world. It
also tends to lead to the thing I need done being handled without the attitude
I wanted. So this blurb from the article opened up a conversation about how we
can handle the “nagging.”
We agreed that when I ask
for something to be taken care of, I have to trust it to get done, but my
husband will give me a time frame in which he will handle it. That way I know it
will be done and he can fit it in on his own timeframe and not feel nagged.
Articles like these really
are amazing! It is so fun to see what you can learn about yourself and your
partner when you take the time to reflect on who God made you to be.
PLEASE take the time to
explore these articles yourself, Josh and I really enjoyed them!
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