Go back to bed!

I am ambitious when I wake up in the morning. There is nothing better than rolling out of bed and getting my day started. The more that I can accomplish by lunch, the happier I am.

My husband does not share that characteristic. He would rather have a slow start. Maybe he will watch some TV or play a quick game of Madden, but much more than that first thing is too much.

Since we have been married Josh has consistently woken up before me but that has not helped this difference in us. When I walk out of our room my mind is filled with the things I want to get done. Since I know that Josh isn't like me in that aspect, I try to hide my desire to begin our tasks but it never works. Today as I poured my cereal I asked him when he wanted to go to the store.

He looked at me and laughed, and then I chuckled too. His response is always the same, "You're doing that thing again! Go back to bed!"

Josh has not figured out how I am able to be task oriented first thing when I wake up, but it's just part of how I am wired. It's an interesting difference but one we are trying to find a balance on.

Why do people leave the church?

Why do people leave the church?

When I was growing up I didn’t understand why all of a sudden people would just stop showing up on Sundays. It didn’t make sense. They looked like they were enjoying the sermons, they participated in worship, and appeared to have relationships within the congregation. So why choose to not show up? I could not imagine being one of those people. I loved church.

That changed when I graduated from college. I stayed at the church I grew up in until I was 21. At that point things shifted in my life and amongst my family. That church no longer felt like home. As we had gotten closer to the core of the church it seemed like we also unearthed a sort of political hierarchy and web of gossip. The more we knew, the more our relationships shifted and it really went downhill. I became aware of some of the inner workings in the people I respected and was really disappointed.

We ended up leaving that church as a family and I am sad to say it was an ugly departure. It saddens me to have watched the people I grew up admiring become angry at the fact that we were leaving. We didn’t intend to leave on a bad note, the church was just no longer where we felt led to be.

It turns out, it’s events like that that cause people to leave the church and never return. I was almost one of those people. I gave of my time and energy to that church and in the end we were treated horribly. That is not how God intended His church to be.

The church is a place that is supposed to be spirit filled, with no limits on who can attend. Where people can come and fall into the acceptance and forgiveness only Christ can offer. There should not be a hierarchy. Rather the church should work toward the common goal of sharing the Gospel with seekers and nurture the Faith of Christians. Judgement and gossip should have no place there.

I felt burned and betrayed by my former church home, and I had my guard up each time I ventured into a new one. For the next 3 years Josh and I “church hopped.” There were even times we would go months without setting foot in a church and think nothing of it.

I believe there are incredible churches out there that are doing exactly as the Bible says. It is that belief that kept a longing in my heart to find a new church home. I think that in my absence from the church I have learned a lot. I have learned who I want to be as a member of the Body of Christ, and I have learned the kind of church I want to make myself home in.

If you have experienced something that has caused you to leave the church, I encourage you to keep trying. Pray for direction and know God has a plan for you. I am proud to say that today Josh and I went to a new church and for the first time in years, it felt like it may be the one for us in this stage of our lives.

Losing People

Losing someone you love is hard. Extremely hard. No matter how prepared you think you are, it’s never truly the case. Loss doesn’t always come in the form of death either, and that can be even more upsetting.

In my life I have experienced three different ways to lose people. The first and most obvious of course is through death. I lost a dear friend and my aunt. My friend was sudden and took everyone by surprise, she had an aneurysm. My aunt lost her fight to breast cancer. Both of these situations have incredible stories that I will probably share one day, but I am not really in a place to relive them.

The second way I have lost someone I love is to health complications. My grandparents have found themselves dealing with horrible conditions that have taken their ability to live their lives normally. These circumstances have robbed them of their vibrancy and the personalities that I adored growing up. Even though they are still physically with me, they are not the same.

The third and final way that I have lost someone was in the sudden and hurtful loss of friendships. In high school I had 3 extremely good friends. As time went on each one of them ended our friendship in awful ways. The first one began being verbally rude towards me and picking apart my choices to the point I could no longer tolerate it. The second began dating a mutual friend. That relationship took priority and eventually it caused a division that could not be overcome. The final friend was the worst. She was like a sister to me and when we left for college things got difficult but I still made an effort. The effort was never returned so I called her out and told her I wanted us to stay friends and needed her to step up. She agreed and apologized. Next thing I know, she deleted me off Facebook! (Yes, that’s stupid but it’s kind of this day and ages way of terminating a friend).

Unfortunately, Josh and I were forced to experience the third form of loss right before our wedding.

His best man was his best friend for ten years and someone I had known since age 6. He was the obvious choice for the role because he knew us so well. When we got engaged he was excited to celebrate with us and he even took our engagement photos! (The one below is one of my favs!)

As the wedding got closer, he changed. There was a new girl in the picture and that relationship made it incredibly hard for us to spend time together. Activities that we all once enjoyed were now looked down on or not even allowed. (She was controlling to the point that she made him give up all of his passwords to social media. And picked a fight over conversations he had prior to them even knowing each other!)

When big events happened in preparation for the wedding, our best man was hardly present. He didn’t attend our engagement party, and fought over the phone with his girlfriend during our shower. It got to the point that he wasn’t even communicating with us and no one knew if he would show up for the bachelor party, let alone the wedding. When the bachelor party rolled around he ended up showing but he wasn’t his normal self and it was all really awkward.

The week before our wedding Josh and I received an incredibly long text from our best man. It made us out to be against his girlfriend and accused us of not supporting the changes he was making to “better himself.” I was appalled and of course responded defending the fact that we weren’t against him bettering himself, that we were against him conforming for a new girl and being a shitty friend. Josh took himself off the group message and handled it on his own. Our best man only responded to Josh and said that he didn’t think we wanted him as the best man so he was stepping down. (And his girlfriend would not be attending). Josh responded and told him, “We will let you know if we want you there, and your girlfriend was already uninvited.” 

We haven't heard from him since.

I was devastated. Our best man and one of our best friends completely pulled a 180 the week before we got married!!!! (All you brides out there can probably sense my fury).

Losing someone you love to death is hard, but it’s a crazy kind of pain when someone chooses to leave you. 

Pre-honeymoon

Josh and I didn’t have a honeymoon. Now before you start thinking, “that’s sad” or “bummer,” there is a very good reason. My company sent us on an all-inclusive vacation 2 weeks before we said “I do.” Amazing right?

It was one of 2 vacations my company sent us on in the last year and it was incredible. The first trip was to Cancun where our CEO rented the entire Fiesta Americana, it was gorgeous and so much fun! This time our CEO rented an entire cruise ship and filled it with my colleagues to take us cruising through the Caribbean. We stopped in Nassau, Bahamas and one of the cruise ships private islands.

Going on vacation 2 weeks prior to your wedding is quite the experience.

If you are looking for a stress break before your big day, this is the way to go. We were out of the country and had no contact with vendors or guests. It forced us to relax and just enjoy our time together.

On the other hand, we were out of the country with no contact with our vendors which can be even more stressful!

Looking back on our experience, I am thrilled we were gone for that week. People will always tell you to try and not make every conversation with your spouse about the wedding, and set aside time to just connect as a couple but that is easier said than done. By removing ourselves from the ability to work on the wedding it really helped us to enjoy the last two weeks leading up to wedding.

We developed a motto, “if it wasn’t done before the Bahamas, it isn’t getting done.” I loved it because it made us focus on the important things and the little details didn’t seem so huge anymore.

So who knows, maybe this is something you would do too. Maybe not, but it is something to consider. 

Laughter fixes it all

Josh and I are no stranger to laughing. At least once a day one of us will do or say something absolutely ridiculous that we end up laughing uncontrollably. The laughter I get to share with my husband is one of my favorite parts of our relationship. We truly complement each other when it comes to sense of humor.

This week has been a little more trying than normal but our ability to laugh has not been deterred. It feels like every time we turn around something is not going right.

On Monday I was going to hot glue a part of our wedding memorabilia together so that we can hang it on our wall. After forgetting I turned the glue gun on and completing several other tasks, I rushed back to the previous project. Since I wasn’t paying close attention I ended up getting a lot of hot glue on my finger. OUCH. My mood was not a good one at this point. Once the initial shock and pain faded away I moved on to making dinner.

I stacked all of the dinner dishes in the sink and let them soak so Josh could wash them. Somehow he knocked one of the pans filled with soapy and greasy water all over the floor. It was a disgusting mess. As we rushed to clean up he bumped my laptop and it fell to the ground.

As dumb as it sounds, I couldn’t help but laugh. There was nothing we could do about the situations we had found ourselves in that night, but we had to look incredibly incompetent. Being able to laugh at the goofy situations we find ourselves in really helped to alleviate the mood of the evening. Had we both just gotten frustrated we could have ruined our whole night, but by simply laughing we were able to recognize things for what they were; mistakes and mishaps.

Things are not always going to go smoothly, but when it’s appropriate, I think it is important to lift the mood and just laugh. 

TV

My husband likes big and fancy televisions. Since we got married we have been using my TV, which is a fine size and quality, and a TV that has followed him since undergrad that is gigantic and heavy. Today we decided it was time to upgrade our viewing standards.

We headed off to Target to take advantage of their buy a TV and get a $50 gift card special.

Our intentions, or should I say my intentions, were to purchase a 50in Vizio. Did we purchase that? Nope! My husband talked me into a 55in instead. I think he always had that in mind…

Anyways, we finally got this beast of a TV into our apartment and discovered that it won’t fit on the TV stand we previously owned. Awesome.

I decided that we were not going to set up this expensive machine and let it sit on the floor where it may tip or get knocked into, so we set off on the adventure of buying a new stand.

Let me tell you, the market for TV stands that hold a 55+ inch is WIDE OPEN! No one carries them. They stop at like, 47 inches. So we got to spend our day going in and out of stores. It was a nightmare! It took us 6 stores to even find one that would work!

Thankfully it was going to be functional enough for our space so we grabbed it up.

It was the LAST ONE!

So now we are home and I am sitting in the living room typing this post as my husband assembles the stand. It was a crazy day, but this evening when we are watching this gorgeous TV, it will be well worth the struggle. 

Unpacking

Josh and I unpack and set-up in very different ways. Over the last couple of days I have learned that the way we are wired to handle tasks can become a source of frustration.

I really like to accomplish as much as humanly possible and want to have my home in order immediately. Josh is way more relaxed and slow when it comes to getting stuff done. I know that I have touched on this in a previous post, but it’ important to understand.

The way I am wired to push myself and finish things is something Josh doesn’t relate to. He would rather take things one box at a time, put everything from the box in its place, then take a break and do something enjoyable. This process, is annoying to me!

I would rather tackle a whole room at a time so that at the end of the day I can see the progress I made. I cannot function when things are a mess so if the house doesn’t get into a functional order fast, I feel like the rest of my life is a disaster too.

So when Josh is on a “hiatus” and I am still working on something, I have found myself to get really annoyed. But when I think about the way we are programmed to do things, it’s really interested to see it play out. We both get things done, we just get them done differently.

Instead of being mad at Josh for not plowing through things, I can now recognize that since he doesn’t work in that way that I am saving us the frustration of me begging him to work like me, or him insisting I do it his way.

We are different, but ultimately the goal is the same. 5 days into our new place, and it truly is almost set up. We worked together, on our own levels and made it happen.

Moving Woes

We are OFFICIALLY moved into Madison! I am so excited to be in our new place. It’s far from being fully “guest ready,” but I feel fairly settled.

As much as I love being here, the process to make it happen was not smooth at all. Everything that could go wrong, did.

The night before we moved we ordered out dinner because we literally had no food left in the apartment. Unfortunately, that dinner had me up at 1:00am throwing up and enduring horrific stomach pain. I barely slept which definitely made Friday extra hard.

Josh worked 3 hours that morning so, I had to do some MAJOR condensing. The day before our big move we realized our vehicles were at capacity but we still had 7 boxes, (large ones at that), to fit in. It was tough, but I somehow managed to get everything in our vehicles.

When he got home we loaded the dresser and bed into the bed of his truck. Only to discover that we didn’t have enough straps to secure them, so Josh had to make a run to the store. It was a nightmare move. We ended up leaving 2 hours behind schedule.

O! And I forgot to mention that somehow Josh lost his apartment key, so he had to also have a duplicate made so we could turn them in to management.

It seemed that the only thing that went right with our move was the weather was amazing. I highly recommend renting a moving truck/trailer. This experience was not one I would like to relive. 

True Love Waits

True Love Waits.

Yes, I understand that in our current culture it seems like that simple phrase is outdated but I am here to share just how important it is.

When I was in 6^th grade I attended a lock-in, an all-nighter hosted by my youth group filled with games and activities. The overwhelming topic of the night was purity and it was there that I made the commitment to myself and God to wait until I was married to have sex. I learned so much that night and understanding God’s perfect plan for my life, it made sense to make the commitment. Some-time later I received a purity ring from my dad, further symbolizing the choice that I made. I wore it every day and it served as a reminder that I had greater things ahead of me.

Of course going through high school was difficult because sex seems to be on everyone’s agenda, but having already decided I wasn’t going to participate helped me to see the ugly side. Yes, people were having sex but it wasn’t glamorous. The girls who partook generally ended up being deemed as “easy” or “dirty.” The boys were of course praised and considered “studs.” The culture we are surrounded by makes it seem like everyone is sleeping around and that it’s just a part of growing up. In reality, not everyone is doing it and if they are it is usually for the wrong reasons.

Sex is not a way to find love, or make you popular. If you choose to not have sex you are not any less of a man, or a prude. Sex is a beautiful gift from God that unites two people in an incredibly intimate way.

Any time I began a relationship with someone in high school I made it incredibly clear that sex outside of a marriage relationship was not going to happen. I believed in my worth and didn’t fall into the trap of thinking I needed to sleep with boys to prove something. God created each one of us in His image, we don’t have to compromise ourselves.

When Josh and I got together at the start of my college career, the same rule applied, and guess what, he respected my decision. That right there ladies is a CLUE. Be with a man who respects your decisions and commitments. NEVER let a man try to convince you otherwise, sex is not love!

Don’t get me wrong, waiting can be really hard. I dated Josh for over 5 years before he even proposed! That is a long time to be in love with someone and still wait.

I have to tell you though, it is INSANELY worth it. Saving yourself for marriage is a beautiful thing, and I am thrilled that Josh and I did. 

Being Independent

Something that I never realized would be an issue in my marriage is. Josh and I both struggle with asking each other for help, or leaning on each other when we don’t feel great. Isn’t that silly? We’ve been together for years and we still are so used to being independent.

I realized that this was an issue the other night when out of nowhere Josh said he had a headache and that was why he was being so difficult. Did he think I was a mind reader? Of course if I knew that his head hurt I wouldn’t be expecting him to be fun and goofy. All he needed to do was tell me.

Another instance that really woke me up to this situation was last week when I had a muscle strain in my hip flexor and could barely put weight on my leg, let alone walk. I spent most of the night in bed and icing my joint. The thought of getting up for water was awful but I felt so ridiculous asking Josh to get it for me. So I got myself up and Josh immediately offered to help me to which I denied his help! How silly is that?

Being married means that you are there for your spouse 100% of the time. Those moments when you need someone to assist you, those moments are where your spouse can step in. It isn’t a sign of weakness (which is what I felt) or a sign that you can’t pull your own weight in the relationship, and it certainly doesn’t make you needy.

When I finally came to the conclusion that if Josh and I would just ask each other for help, or make our health known, it could prevent a lot of misunderstandings and frustrations. So we talked about it, and agreed to work harder on letting each other step up.

There will be times when you need your spouse and they will need you. Take care of each other.

Friends aren't always forever

Over the years people have been weaved in and out of my life, like I’m sure they have in yours too. I’ve had several “best friends,” maintained a large friend base, and met more people than I can count. Each relationship I formed played a role in helping develop who I am and how I interact in relationships.

As people exited my life I would always wonder why. It seemed that without fail they would take their leave when I was going through a transition and that stung big time. Having people you love fail to be there as your life is changing is really difficult.

I’ve learned though that when people exit it’s for something better to enter.

Josh is the first person to come into my life during a time that I would desperately need a friend and actually stick it out.

Now that may sound sad, but it’s absolutely not! Looking back on my friendships before Josh I learned something from every single one of them. I learned to be forgiving, to depend on myself, say what I mean, and not tolerate rudeness. The friendships that I thought for sure would be forever things all had massive flaws. I was not able to be my authentic self with anyone before Josh.

As he and I moved from friendship to being in a romantic relationship, I also had my eyes opened to some other pretty amazing people in my life that I may not have recognized beforehand. (We also recognized people in our life that were toxic and ended up losing those individuals, that’s a story for another day, it was a SHOCKER).

The friends that Josh and I have are amazing people and we can be ourselves with them. It may have taken us longer than most people but, we have found people I know will be our “forever friends.” 

Prayer

Prayer is an extremely important aspect to anyone’s Christian journey and faith. When Josh and I began our relationship and as he began further deepening his faith, we started a daily routine to incorporate prayer in our lives.

Every night before we got off the phone we would take turns praying over our relationship and the various things going on in our lives or those we love. In those moments I truly believe that God was bringing us closer to Him and to one another.

Praying together helped us to create a culture in our relationship of bringing our relationship and concerns before God.

Naturally difficult times occurred but because of the prayer routine we had created we have always been able to remind ourselves that God has us covered. Nothing beats being at a weak moment, when you feel like life is crashing all around you, and your partner offers to take your turn and pray over you. There have be numerous times that Josh was able to bring me back to a solid place by reminding me of all the times God answered our prayers.

Having a spouse that is able to re-center my faith means everything. When I feel overwhelmed, I love that Josh will hold my hand and offer to pray for me.

Prayer truly changes things. God hears the cries of our hearts and meets us exactly where we need Him to.

Now that we are married, prayer is still a huge part of our lives. Granted, we lost track a bit with all the changes we are undergoing, but we are consciously making the effort to pray together before bed. I am so glad to be on the same page with my husband.

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Philippians 4:6-7 

Distance

When Josh and I were dating at various times in our relationship we lived in different zip codes. For two years he was at ISU and then he did another two years at UW Madison before we got married. Being apart was definitely a struggle and having to wait for every other weekend to see each other, or until the end of the day for a good-night catch-up phone call, is not super exciting.

There were definitely moments that I was unbearable to tolerate because my patience had worn thin with our situation. I wanted desperately to be like my friends whose boyfriends were less than 30 minutes away at any given time. It sucked walking to class by myself when it seemed like everyone else was holding hands. In my opinion, distance did NOT make the heart grow fonder! I spent a lot of time being discontent and wishing things were different.

Oddly enough, looking back I am extremely thankful for those 4 years. That time apart and dealing with our difficult circumstances led us to have an extremely strong connection, and we learned to make the most of the time we did spend together. It even helped us to develop ourselves into the person we were meant to be on our own.

Honestly when I think about the couples that I was jealous of, the ones who got to see each other all the time, they didn’t have it that well off. In fact, every single one of them is no longer together! For various reasons they all called it quits shortly after they finished college.

I can’t imagine not being with Josh and if we had to endure living far from each other in order for it to pay off with us spending our lives together now, it was WELL worth it!

God knows what is best for us and for our relationship. I know that He planned our dating story in the perfect way and I cannot wait to see what our marriage holds.

Falling

Ok, today I am going to share with you a very interesting and hilarious story from my past because my darling husband reminded me of it…

Yesterday while packing I decided to take a break and sat on the edge of our bed only to slide off it onto the floor. You see our comforter is a silky type of fabric and I was wearing my spandex workout pants. The two don’t mix so I found myself on the floor.

Well, I shared this story with my husband who says (and I am not kidding), “Do you feel fat?”

I think my eyes bugged out of my head. I could not believe my husband came to the conclusion that his wife is fat because I slid onto the floor! My reaction was of course, “Excuse me? Do I you think I am fat?!?!”

Realizing his error, he quickly explained that my story reminded him of another similar experience from when we were dating…

While Josh was a student at ISU, I went to visit him one weekend and it poured the whole time! We were cooped up in his apartment with him roommates and I was so sick of watching TV, so we decided to venture out to go to the store and get something to cook.

As you can imagine puddles were everywhere and the dirt path was now a muddy mess, so we walked along the lining beams to get to my car. Well, I was trying to be quick and was not wearing the best shoes, and I slipped off the beam and into the mud. I was so embarrassed that I couldn’t even speak. I walked right back into the apartment and closed the bathroom door. Josh was right behind me asking me if I was hurt or needed anything.

In the bathroom I regained my composure and changed into non-muddy clothes. I opened the bathroom door and walked right back outside towards my car, still not saying a word. Josh followed still trying to understand what was wrong with me.

As we drove toward the store Josh pleaded with me to talk to him and tell him I was OK. I was fighting back tears and super upset but I finally did. My response to his questions and concern was, “I feel FAT!” with tears streaming down my face.

I obviously caught Josh off-guard because he started LAUGHING!

I was shocked that was his reaction and didn’t speak again. He kept on laughing and finally said, “You fell so you feel fat? Do you think people who are fat just fall all the time??”

It was ridiculous. Hearing him repeat back what I said was hilarious and I started laughing too. My ridiculous reasoning for being embarrassed was funny and to this day we still laugh about it.

Bugs...

I have been married for 52 days now. (I know, what an amazing accomplishment! I’m almost to Kim & Kris’ record! Sorry, that was low…)

One of the best things about being married I have already touched on, my husband is my protector. A few posts back I shared my fear of the dark and the extreme measures Josh goes through to make me feel safe, like checking for zombies and other insane things in our closets.

So let’s talk about another thing I can’t handle, bugs. I’m talking spiders, june bugs, ants, really anything that may decide it’s OK to crawl on or near me.

For the first few weeks in our apartment it seemed like every other day there would be a GIANT black spider in our shower. I would cry out for Josh and he’d come in, smack it and then rinse it down the drain. This little dance went on for like 3 weeks! That little spider kept coming back!

Yes, I know that it may not have been the exact spider, but I think it was.

Finally that little bugger came back while Josh was at work so I knew I would have to take care of it to ensure it didn’t escape our tub and wander our house. I grabbed a shoe and SMEARED that spider then washed it down the drain. Want to know why I’m so confident that it was the same spider? Since I smashed it, it hasn’t come back! That little guy was resilient.

The next bug incident came when Josh and I were getting ready for bed about 2 weeks ago.  We are all cozy when all of a sudden I saw a HUGE ant!!! He was crawling on our covers! I freaked out and pointed and Josh went to get a tissue. GROSS!!!

I didn’t even want to use the blankets because I was afraid it may be a pack animal! I know, that’s not very likely but why was he in my bed!!!!

Anyways, having my husband there to take care of me during the freak instances of life means so much. I love that I can just point with a grossed out face and he knows to get the bug that must be lurking. Or that I can tap him in the middle of the night and he’ll go check our closets for creepers. He’s pretty incredible and I am so blessed and feel so safe, even from my crazy fears.

Junking

Josh and I are moving into our second apartment at the end of this month. I cannot wait to be back in Madison, close to our families and friends.

Since we aren’t in this apartment for much longer we have been taking inventory on what needs to get packed and what we want to sell in order to streamline the process.

We decided that 3 things have to go: our futon, kitchen table, and TV stand. As you can imagine since this was our first apartment, all three were either hand-me-downs or garage sale finds. The futon had seen better days and left us with achy backs if we sat on it too long, we never used our kitchen table (the legs are wobbly), and the TV stand needs some TLC that I just don’t want to give it.

We posted all 3 items on different garage sale Facebook pages and hoped for the best. Within an hour we had several hits on the futon and ended up selling it for $10 same day! The TV stand also peaked some interest and it’s being sold today! It’s amazing to see the way garage sale sights work. The saying is true: one man’s trash is another man’s treasure.

While I do love the results we got from selling our items on garage sale sights, I will admit to being a “Junker.” I LOVE to find unique pieces that are just out of the ordinary and dress them up. This hobby of mine gets me in trouble with Josh, he’s not big into the re-purposing movement.

My favorite piece in our place right now is our coffee table. Its square and clearly from the 1970’s. When I bought it, the table was this ugly yellow and I decided to paint it this awesome teal blue. The table itself cost me $20 and the paint, probably another $5 - $10. I LOVE that table.

I don’t think I will ever be over my “junking” addiction, (my favorite place is old barn sales). But I do know that our home will be filled with amazing pieces that you can’t find anywhere else.

Baptism

Faith in God has played a HUGE role in my relationship with my husband. I could write forever about all the times God intervened or had a hand in something that was going on. Today I want to tell you a very special story about something amazing that happened.

Josh was not a Christian when we first met, but over the time we spent together he began exploring what Christianity was and many different things occurred that finally brought him to accept Christ as his Lord and Savior. Someday I will share more of those stories…

Today I want to talk about a very special gift that I feel like God gave me through Josh.

Over the course of our relationship Josh and I had many discussions about Baptism. Unfortunately, when the different churches we attended offered Baptism, it was never at a time that Josh felt was right.

It honestly was something I wanted for him, but I didn’t want to make it into a chore and nag him into doing it. I believe it has to be the individual’ decision. So when we got engaged and he still hadn’t been baptized I was kind of bummed but figured he would just end up getting baptized once we were married.

To my surprise and delight three weeks before our wedding Josh and I were on the phone (he was still living in Madison, and I was in Marengo), and he said he had been praying about it and was ready to be baptized! I was so excited!

So I contacted my friend Pat who is the Youth Pastor at Willow Huntley and asked if he would be willing to do a Baptism immediately following our Rehearsal. (Pat performed our wedding ceremony). Of course he agreed and we set it up with our venue to use their pool.

The day of our rehearsal was crazy and stressful, and if I am being honest, I was not a pleasant individual. As we completed decorating, and started practicing for the ceremony I had almost completely forgotten about Josh’s plan to get baptized!

Once the rehearsal was over, Pat invited everyone to join us in the pool house to celebrate Josh’s baptism.

As Josh and Pat entered the water and our family and friends circled the pool to witness, my heart was so full! Pat performed a beautiful baptism, talking about how Josh had committed himself to follow Christ and that he would also lead his family to Christ, and then he dunked him!

The words I heard, and watching Josh get submerged I was overcome.

I cried as he came back up and truly felt so blessed. The man of my dreams had followed God’s prompting and was baptized the day before we were married! I could not have been happier.

God took something I was unsure of happening, and placed it in our lives at the perfect time. He is so Good!

Moving On Out

Have you ever had to move? Silly question right? At some point everyone has to move. Maybe it’s from your parent’s house into your new dorm room or maybe it’s from your dorm room into the apartment you are sharing with your husband.

For me I have moved several times in my life. The first time I don’t remember since I was super little, but the next time was into a dorm, then out of a dorm back home, and then from my parent’s home to our apartment. Moving is difficult for me. I struggle with change and leaving the familiar. However, the next move I am facing is one I am so excited about!

This summer Josh and I have been in Manitowoc, WI so that he could work as a summer clerk with a law firm here. It’s a nice small town with some decent amenities but it is SO FAR from everyone and everything we know and love. We are 3 hours away from our families on a good day and since we don’t know anyone in Manitowoc that’s not OK with me.

Thankfully in 2 weeks we are moving to Madison so that Josh can finish up Law School at UW. There we have developed friendships and are way closer to our families.

As I look around our current home and take inventory of our belongings it is becoming increasingly clear that we have our work cut out for us with this move. We have 3 large pieces of furniture, and TONS of other assorted things. I have been googling moving companies, and looking into ways to pack efficiently. No matter how you slice it, this is going to be quite the process!

Since I am crazy organized and a big time planner, the exact opposite of my husband, I am taking the lead on this task. It will be interesting to see how much my skills will come into play and if moving really is something someone can plan out to a T.

No matter what, I know we will get our things moved and we will be on to our new adventure. If anyone has tips though… I am always willing to listen!

Gratitude.

I’ve decided to throw up a second post for today because my heart is so filled with gratitude and love.

Since I was little I have been taught to be wise in selecting my friends and mentors. Over time I have developed almost a “sixth sense” about people and I can pretty quickly decide if they are someone I should invest my attention in.

For the last few days I have been struggling with some “grown up” choices and have been really torn up about how to handle them. I spent hours talking to people I respect; my husband, my parents, and friends (many of whom don’t even know I was struggling).

It took time but I am finally starting to become calm about what is in front of me, and I am confident that I can make the right decisions.

The people I have in my life are truly gifts from God. I cannot begin to express how important it is to invest in people and develop strong relationships. Obviously if they share your belief it’s even better because they are able to connect with you on a deeper level.

Take true inventory of the people in your life. Recognize who will be standing by your side when the going gets tough and pour into those relationships. It’s in the difficult times that we need strong relationships.

This post is just a blanket “THANK YOU” to everyone I have connected with this week. You may not have even noticed but our conversations have truly had an impact.

Drive-Thru Ice Cream.

Well folks, we were at it again. You may remember my former post about how sick Josh and I got after eating ice cream, well, we went back.

After dinner last night we were sitting around watching TV with my brother (Nolan is visiting for the week), and I decided I was in the need for a little after dinner snack. I’m not that great at keeping snacks in the house so I knew our choices were limited.

So I casually said that I wanted dessert. 

My husband’s head turned to me so fast, I thought it may fall off. He smiled and said he could also go for a tasty treat. Nolan caught on and next thing I know the three of us were putting on shoes.

On our way to the door I caught a glimpse of the kitchen. It was a pit! So I made a deal with the boys that we would go for ice cream after the kitchen was taken care of. Since I cooked the boys cleaned and while they were busy I started having second thoughts. You know, dessert guilt.

I looked at Josh and said I didn’t think we should go, that we should save the money, and not eat junk. It looked like I punched him in the gut, my man LOVES ice cream. His look was so hilarious I just laughed. He then said, “Are you joking to play with my emotions or are you really second guessing it?” Mid-laugh, I said never mind.

So we found ourselves in the drive-thru again and I just have to laugh at this experience. Josh and I have such a quirky relationship and ice cream is no exception. I love that something as simple as ice cream can make us laugh and be goofy. I guess once in a while it is OK to indulge in dessert. 

Communicate.

Communication. To some people, communication is as easy as breathing, but for others it can be difficult to find the right words.

In relationships of all kinds, communication is the foundation. If you are unable to communicate your thoughts, ideas, and opinions with the people around you, relationships can suffer. The marriage relationship is no exception to this rule.

My husband and I have been in each other’s lives for about 7 years, and over the course of that time we have been able to develop our communication skills.

When we first got together, I was a hothead who loved being heard and Josh was super passive, so if he didn’t like what was happening he would avoid it. Naturally this led to many difficult patches in our relationship. Thankfully, as we grew up and became more mature, our ability to communicate with each other became easier. It has also helped that we now better understand one another’s silent cues and quirks.

Josh in particular is phenomenal at that. When I am upset, sad, frustrated, or discouraged, I have an incredibly hard time just saying what is making me feel that way. My theory is, I just don’t want to freaking cry! (For me crying is a whole other ball game, the nose starts running, my face squishes up, it truly is just not a great sight). So when Josh picks up on my physical signs of being “not OK” he uses his understanding of me to help coax me into finding the words I need to express to him why I am upset. I am so appreciative of Josh’s personality and his ability to calmly enable me to express myself.

Being able to communicate effectively is such a crucial tool. Take some time to consider how you communicate with the people around you and assess areas you may want to improve. Remember that communicating effectively is something that can be developed over time, much like it was in my relationship with my husband.

When two people are committed to understanding one another, you can create effective communication.

The DMV.

Over the weekend Josh and I went back to our home town to visit with our families and celebrate our nephews first birthday. Since we are living 3 hours from there and we don’t have a permanent address of our own, all of the “newly married errands” have to get done when we are in town.

This weekend was no exception and bright and early Saturday morning Josh and I trekked out to the DMV. My social security card had finally arrived with my new name so I needed to get my license updated as well.

When we walked in the typical crowd was already waiting, young people preparing for their first drivers test, and the older group getting theirs renewed.

Also typical of the DMV, our wait was ridiculous. When we arrived and selected our number we realized that there were 20 people ahead of us. Awesome. Who doesn’t love spending forever at the DMV?

Almost two hours later, my number was called and I bee-lined for the desk. The process was so FAST for me. It probably took 4 minutes total between me getting to the desk and having my new license in hand.

I felt like a kid in a candy store getting to walk out of the DMV, and I was so excited to cross this task off our to-do list.

The joke for that morning was, “True love means spending your Saturday at the DMV.” Thinking back, that joke isn’t really far off from the truth. There are going to be all kinds of things in our marriage that neither of us want to do, but because we love each other, we are going to tackle them together. 

By the way... It's official! I'm a Greatsinger!