Sunsets

This post goes out there to all of the women. (But applies to men too!)

Why don’t we love ourselves? Why do we look in the mirror and not like what we see? Why do we try desperately to be like other people or wish for something about ourselves to be different?

We are created by God. He hand-selected every personality trait and physical characteristic. He knows what our strengths are and where we have weaknesses. He designed us for a purpose and He loves us!

WE ARE SO LOVED!

I know that there are moments where it’s easy to lose sight of our value. I imagine that’s part of human nature (and probably even societal conditioning). But we don’t have to live in that head space. We need to check ourselves and remember that God didn’t make a mistake when He created us.

The best illustration I have heard that really hit this point home was shared with me when I was in college. One of the RA’s did a girl’s night and shared something God had revealed to her when she was having one of those moments, feeling less that great about herself.

God reminded her of a sunset and the various forms they take. They can have clouds or no clouds. The colors can be any variety of shades. But the point was every sunset is different, each one hand-created by God. And God continued to reveal to her, that if He took the time and effort to create a one of a kind sunset every night, didn’t she think He took more care into designing her? And if that’s the case, shouldn’t she be in awe of herself like she is by each sunset?

The same goes for each one of us. We were created with so much precision and care. We deserve to love ourselves and value ourselves. Don’t continue to look poorly upon yourself. Take the time and effort to truly learn to value and appreciate all you have to offer.

And remember, you are so loved!

Forgive and forget?

Last night Josh and I had an interesting conversation about the phrase, “Forgive but never forget.” I can’t recall exactly how it got brought up, but it was interesting to discuss our views on the phrase that gets tossed around every now and again.

Josh doesn’t like the phrase because he feels that if you have truly forgiven someone you shouldn’t hold on to the offense. My stance was that the phrase makes sense because forgiving someone doesn’t mean that what happened no longer exists and you have the right to tread carefully in the future.

As we dove deeper into the conversation, we realized our differing opinions stemmed from the fact that we see people differently.

When Josh meets someone he has little to no expectations about who they are or how they will act. He doesn’t assume everyone is decent and he takes things in stride. As he develops relationships his expectations will rise, but he doesn’t have high expectations in the beginning.

On the other hand, when I meet someone I immediately have high expectations. I assume that people will treat me the way I treat them and it is only after they have wronged me that my opinion changes.

Since I don’t guard myself in the beginning, it is easier for me to get hurt and be let down. So to me, the phrase, “forgive but never forget” makes sense. I am able to forgive the offense, but in the process I am learning more about the individual. I believe that actions reveal a person’s true nature and if you have already been hurt once, it is foolish to put yourself in a position to be hurt in the same way again.

It was interesting to have this discussion and realize the differences Josh and I have in the way we view people. Especially since it’s been apparent within the last year that I need to be more cautious of how high my expectations are. (Unfortunately, there have been several instances where I was let down by someone I admired because of decisions they made).

I’m sure there is a balance between seeing the good in people while also allowing room for error, but I haven’t found it yet. Maybe in the future I will, it sure would help keep me from being disappointed!

Text Messages

Being married sometimes is a funny thing. While you are dating you may wake up to text messages that say something like, “Good morning beautiful, I hope you slept well. Have a great day today and I can’t wait to see you later! I love you!” Which of course are great ways to start your day.

However, when you are married you are more likely to wake up to a text message like this: “I need more deodorant, lol. Good morning bug.” A little less mushy and a little more needs driven.

Then there comes the response. To the first hypothetical text while you are dating, you may respond with something like this: “Good morning to you too love! I slept great and hope you did too. I love you bunches and can’t wait to see you!” Equally adorable and sweet.

To the married text message, you will probably respond like this: “I need there to not be giant spiders in our apartment lol. What kind do you want?”

It’s a funny shift once you get married isn’t it? You may be wondering why on Earth I am writing this. Well, the reason I am writing about this is because that is exactly the message I woke up to this morning.

When we were dating, Josh and I would send those long and sweet good morning text messages to each other. Each day we would try to outdo the last. It was a mini competition between one another to be more adorable each morning.

Now that we are married, things are clearly different. But different in a great way. As I read the text message Josh sent me this morning, I couldn’t help but smile. The two of us may no longer be in that cutesy “good morning text” phase, but we are in the phase of actually doing life together. He depends on me and I depend on him.

Yes, it may be silly that a simple text asking for deodorant opened up this train of thought, but it’s true. As much as I enjoyed the cute things that came with dating, I would never want to get them back in exchange for where we are now.

**Disclaimer- If you are worried about completely losing the cutesy part of your relationship with marriage, don’t! I still get cute messages, they are just not the same as when we were dating.

A restaurant review

It’s Monday, June 27, 2016 and this marks the day of my 200^th post! To be honest, I never expected to get this far and I certainly didn’t expect to have the number of views I do. When I began this blog, I was just looking for a creative outlet and a way to keep my writing somewhat consistent. I did not think I would stick with it this long and enjoy it as much as I have. It’s kind of exciting!

As I sit here amidst crumbs from Harvey’s latest treat and covered in his fur, I am day dreaming about the date Josh and I went on this past Saturday. So I will be doing my first “restaurant review.”

Since our anniversary was on a Monday, we opted to make reservations for over the weekend at a fancy restaurant. We spent a lot of time looking online for places in the area and talked to some people who have lived here for a while. Finally, we settled on a place called Al Corso in the town of Collins.

The pictures online show this cute Barn Red building that is filled with tables with white table cloths and a gorgeous bar. After scanning the menu provided on their website, we decided it would be well-worth the try so we made a reservation.

When Saturday evening rolled around, we got dressed up and headed to Collins. We are still so new to the area, we had never been to Collins and didn’t know what to expect. And, it’s a good thing this restaurant’s website had pictures because as we pulled into Collins, we didn’t think we were in the right place.

It was a very tiny town, I’m talking maybe 4 buildings and 7 houses. And the 4 buildings we saw as we drove down the street looked pretty worn and forgotten. I thought we had the wrong address because I couldn’t imagine a fine dining restaurant in this tiny town. But sure enough as we approached the corner, Al Corso stood out in its up-kept glory. (Still, I couldn’t imagine there was fine dining).

We entered the restaurant to find it exactly like the pictures. It was well decorated, and had an intimate atmosphere. The hostess greeted us and led us to sit at the bar for a drink prior to our reservation. Turns out, Al Corso has quite the whiskey and wine list, but we still opted for specialty drinks off their menu. The drinks were delicious and not skimping on the alcohol, well-worth their prices. Plus their bartender was super friendly!

Once we were seated the hostess shared with us the specials and gave us the menus. They had items on the menu like: bacon wrapped scallops, red pepper soap, salmon, steak, lamp, lobster, clams, etc. Exactly the kind of restaurant we were looking for to celebrate our first year together. So let me walk you through our meal…

The first thing we did was order an appetizer. I am a HUGE fan of scallops and when I saw they had bacon wrapped scallops on the menu, I knew we had to give them a try. A rectangular white plate was brought out to use with three large scallops wrapped in bacon sitting on an apple butter sauce. The plating was beautiful and artistic. And the food was far better than I imagined. The scallops melted in your mouth and apple butter sauce was phenomenal.

Then came our soups. We both decided to give the roasted red pepper a try and it was brought out with the bread. The soup was incredible. I am not normally one to choose the soup over a salad, but it was delicious and even had “foam art” on the top. The attention to detail was impressive. And even the bread was out of this world. It was sun dried tomato bread with a basil butter. Now, I normally enjoy the bread at restaurants, but theirs was probably the best ever.

As soon as we finished our soups, the main course was brought out. Josh ordered the surf and turf, I ordered the seafood medley pasta.

Josh’s steak was so good! One bite actually made me want to order steak, and I have never wanted steak at a restaurant before. My seafood was insane. There were two large shrimp, two large scallops, and 2 large pieces of lobster on top of the bed of pasta. Seriously, LARGE. The lobster pieces were as big as the palm of my hand! Dinner was so good, we weren’t even done eating and already talking about our next visit to Al Corso!

To say this restaurant met our expectations for a memorable and fancy anniversary dinner would be an understatement. Al Corso exceeded our expectations at every bite and left us eager to return. I highly recommend them!

Having a memorable date night with my husband to celebrate our first year of marriage was so special and I am thrilled we chose to dine with Al Corso.

Kindness

Wouldn’t it be nice if instead of showcasing something ugly and negative, we gave the spotlight to something powerful and positive?

I would much rather hear about the restaurant that offers free food to the homeless than hear about some disgruntled individual who chose to act out in violence.

There needs to be a shift in the country. People need to stop giving negativity all of their attention. I believe that if positive things received more air-time than negative, the negative junk would soon take a drastic drop.

But the change starts with you. The way you interact with people and the image you project to the world. The things you waste your time with and the things you choose to talk about.

Say hello to the elderly gentleman you pass on the sidewalk. Offer to bring the cart back to the corral for the mom trying to get kids in car seats. Hold open the door for those coming in behind you.

Small acts make big differences.

For example, this week I met our neighbor’s little girls. They live in the apartment above us and were outside playing when I went to take Harvey out. They asked if they could pet him and I of course said yes. As they asked questions about him, I remembered that Josh and I had noticed their chalk drawings on the sidewalk leading up to their apartment door. Since their sidewalk is shorter than ours (our door is further from the parking lot), I invited to girls to use our sidewalk for their chalk drawings anytime they wanted more creative space.

The conversation pretty much ended there and I brought Harvey back inside. That afternoon I was going to take him out again and discovered they had taken me up on the offer to color on our sidewalk. And one of the messages was very sweet, “You are the best nabbers (neighbors) ever!”

Spread kindness! It comes full circle.

Ecclesiastes 9:9

Last night Josh and I finally made the time to get back into the routine of doing our weekly Bible Study together. Since our move, most of our time together has been making sure all of our T’s are crossed and I’s dotted. From making sure bills are paid on time, important places have our new address, and getting settled, it’s been a little hectic and our Bible Study fell by the wayside.

So while he was at work yesterday, I put in some time and found a devotional we could do together.

I found a website called Simply One and chose one of the several topics they had listed. Here is the link to the exact one we did last night, http://simplyoneinmarriage.com/enjoy-your-life-together/

 

It ended up being about cherishing the time you have with your spouse and enjoying one another. It references the verse Ecclesiastes 9:9. The translation in the Contemporary English Version of the Bible reads like this, “Life is short, and you love your wife, so enjoy being with her. This is what you are supposed to do as you struggle through life on this earth.”

I loved it. So often we take for granted the time that we have with each other. We get caught up in the things we have to do and figure that we will make time for one another later. Well, that is not how God designed our marriages to be. We should be enjoying each other all of the time, not just when the schedule permits or when we squeeze in a date night.

It prompted Josh and I to recognize the progress we have made and the areas we want to continue to improve. For example, while Josh was still in school we did a lot of things separately. He had his priorities and I had mine. Then at the end of the day we would converge to have dinner and watch TV. Now that he has graduated and settled in at his new job, our priorities have welded together and we are doing more with one another than before. It’s nothing for him to offer to run an errand with me now, whereas before he would have rather had down time. And we do a lot more impromptu mini dates, like running out for ice cream or heading to the beach.

The time we spend together now is much more deliberate and we truly do enjoy each other’s company. We are finding a balance between making sure things get done and enjoying ourselves.

This is a concept I don’t ever want us to miss. I want Josh and I to always enjoy the time we have together, even if it’s just a quick run to grab milk. At the end of the day, God blessed us with each other to do life with and I don’t want to squander it. 

Financial Risks

I believe in taking risks. The kind that may make other people uncomfortable. The financial kind.

I love the idea of getting in on the ground floor of an opportunity and seeing what happens. I believe in the dream that gets sold with every pitch and can imagine my life transforming because of the risk I was willing to take.

Because of this part of me that believes in the impossible, I have gotten involved in three Network Marketing Companies in my short career. Network Marketing, in my opinion, is a phenomenal opportunity to pursue financial freedom by selling products you believe in, love, and use. Granted, not many people hear “Network Marketing” and get excited, but I do.

As I’ve shared in a previous post, I grew up in the industry and knew I would always want to work for myself and control my finances and time.

My first toe-dipping experience came from a company called SendOutCards. The idea was stellar in my opinion. By signing up you get your own “Back Office” where you can plug important dates into a calendar and cards will automatically be sent on your behalf. Think about it, no more missed anniversaries, birthdays, or holidays. Plus, you could send out thank-you’s, condolences, and more. The concept was awesome, but when I got involved it wasn’t the right time for me, so I fizzled out.

The second experience was with a company called Rain. They boasted having a healthy energy drink and other beverages along that line. I went after it for a while, made a little money, and hosted a few events. The company was very young, and my sponsor ended up not being the person I thought she was and I could no longer pursue it in good conscious. Shortly after I deactivated, the company ended up dissolving and forming into something else.

Fast forward to the present and I am with Nerium International. Marketing anti-aging products, driving a free Lexus, taking fabulous trips, and owning my time. All because I took a risk and invested the only money I had in my savings account.

To me the risk is well-worth the reward. Each company I have been a part of has been an incredible learning experience as well as a cherished blessing. Even the bad experiences were good because they helped shaped me. The desire I have to chase my dreams, take risks, and see what happens has paid off in incredible ways and I wouldn’t change it for anything.

Taking a few risks now and then is exciting, and you never know when something will change your life. 

Putting off projects

Transitions in life are hard. Especially for someone like me who does not handle change very well. I like things to stay the way they are and prefer it when changes occur slowly over a large amount of time. The less obvious a change is to me, the better.

I cling to the things I know, the things that make me comfortable and feel reassured. Routine and order are important to me because they provide a sense of stability.

Yet, I find myself in the midst of plenty of change almost around every corner. Interestingly enough, the current changes I find myself in the middle of are opening doors for me that I never thought would open.

There has been a project on my heart that I have wanted to tackle for years. It’s been a dream of mine that I have been putting off and always finding reasons why I couldn’t “waste” time going after it.

(I’m being vague on purpose, I haven’t convinced myself yet that I will even finish it and would hate to have it out there).

With my husband working full-time and my business growing steadily, I have found extra time in my day that I could fill by chasing my dream. When I first realized that I had this extra time, I did everything in my power to fill it. I deep cleaned the apartment, organized all of the paperwork we have accumulated, and done my best to make our home more functional. And as you can imagine, I ran out of stuff to do that would keep me “too busy” for my dream.

So now, each day I have dedicated time to put in the work and stop putting off the one thing I have thought about doing since I was in the 6^th grade.

And that got me to thinking. There has to be other people out there just like me. People who have a dream in their heart that has been tugging at them for years, but they haven’t taken the time to do it. It’s sad to think that quite possibly, every person is ignoring a piece of themselves and not doing something that would bring them joy.

If you have something that has been on your mind and in your heart that you have been putting off, please stop. Choose today as the day you stop ignoring something that would fulfill you. Remember that you only have one shot to live this life, don’t spend it pushing down a desire. 

Happy First Anniversary!

In recognition of our 1 Year Anniversary, here is the note I wrote for my husband along with our anniversary pictures:

One year ago, you and I stood face to face as a storm rolled in and soaked our family and friends. It wasn't how we imagined our wedding at all, but I can honestly say I wouldn't have had it any other way. That day welcomed in the next chapter of our lives and a brand new adventure. Our first year as husband and wife was a whirlwind filled with beautiful memories: our Niagara Falls Road Trip, Winery Hopping, 3 moves, Family Functions, Law School Graduation, Adopting Harvey, and so many more. You are my best friend and the most perfect husband God could have ever chosen for me. There is no one else I would rather be shamelessly rushing to get ice cream with before the store closed (which happened more times than I care to admit), or be cleaning up after Harvey with at 4am. You are my perfect compliment and I love you more each day. Thank you for upholding your vows and soaking our sink and floor each morning like you are in a face wash commercial. Thank you for loving me even when I am unlovable, for telling me I am beautiful when my hair is a mess and I am wearing that junky shirt you hate, and for always being the calm to my crazy.
Happy Anniversary Lovebug!

EDIT: Here is my wonderful hubby's response:

One year. The time it took for me to win over the girl of my dreams.

She was a stunner. She was motivated. She was confident.
She was my best friend, my supporter, my confidant.
She was everything I was looking for.
She was the love of my life and she knew it...
But she was stubborn.

One year. The time I have been married to the woman of my dreams.

She grows more beautiful every day. She amazes me with her drive to succeed. She is strong.
She is my best friend, my greatest ally, my rock.
She is everything I've ever wanted.
She is the love of my life and she knows it...
And she's still stubborn.

I'd marry her all over again. Happy First Anniversary Aves. I love you and cannot wait to see what Year 2 has in store!

Year in Review

We usher in our 2^nd year of marriage this Monday! I cannot believe that it has already been a year, and then on the other hand I can’t believe it’s only been a year. Time flies when you are having fun!

Since year one is traditionally the “paper” anniversary, I spent some time on Pinterest trying to come up with a cute way to bookmark this special day in our lives. I mentioned in a previous post that Josh and I plan to book an outing for later this summer, but I still wanted to do something else that would be special.

Sure enough, Pinterest delivered! I stumbled across this awesome post about creating a “Year in Review.” There were several different examples to pull from, and I knew that this would be a fun way to look back in the future on the things we enjoyed from our first year of marriage. It was fun to think back on all we have done and remember some of the unique aspects. I enjoyed this project so much that I think it will become a staple for how we close out each year of marriage. It will be so cool to see the different experiences each year brings and be able to reflect on it over time.

So here is our Year in Review:

Changes since the "I do's"

Josh and I are coming up on our 1 year wedding anniversary! Reflecting on the last 12 months has helped me to realize that a lot has changed since saying “I do.” There is something about getting that “Mrs.” title that shakes things up a bit and introduces changes into your life.

·         The bills double. Sure, this may be a given because you are combining the bills of two people, but did you consider the number of bills the two of you will take on apart from the ones you are already carrying with you? I know before we got married I thought the only new bills would be our rent and utilities. I went through the budget this morning, I discovered just how many bills we accumulated. Just consider the different insurances you will have to take out policies for!

·         Your priorities/wants shift. The things you used to want to do or spend money on when you were responsible for yourself no longer take precedents over the things you and your spouse both want. When you were single it may have been no big deal to swing through the drive-through while spending the day blowing some money shopping. But now that money could go towards a vacation or nice date night. And it’s not only with money either. Some things that seemed important, like bar hopping with friends on a Friday, don’t seem to live up to the perfection that is staying in with your spouse to rent a movie and gorge on pizza.

·         You stop sweating the small stuff. Glasses break. Floors get dirty. Dinner doesn’t turn out. You have bad hair days. The dog wakes you up at 3am. It happens, move forward and laugh if you can.

·         It’s no longer about you. When you say “I do” the focus shifts. You are no longer a separate entity; you have just become a “we.” Embrace the “we.” Work together, compromise, and be respectful.

·         Submission kind of matters. If you are anything like me the word “submit” makes you cringe. I used to think what a joke it was to expect a woman to submit to her husband. Never in a million years did I think I would ever fall into that “trap.” I am independent, strong-willed, and stubborn. Submission was never on my agenda. But I learned as my marriage began that there is a time and place for me to display those qualities, but it is not with my husband. God designed a marriage with the husband as the head of the household for a reason, and I learned this past year that submission is not bad. It’s a part of God’s design and I have decided to make it a priority. I’m certainly not an expert at submitting to husband, but I am improving. And to be honest, giving up the need to be in control and dominating is really nice.

Here's me laughing as Josh recites his vows.

·         You’re going to laugh a whole lot more. If you thought your spouse was funny while you were dating, marriage ushers you into a comedy show for the rest of your life. Josh is hilarious, and the one liners he would drop while we were dating are NOTHING compared to the stand-up act I get to sit front row in every day.

Bottom line, marriage is awesome and I cannot wait to see what the coming year has in store for us!

Rainy Laundry Days

It is a lazy and rainy Wednesday at the Greatsinger home today. Harvey has been sleeping on my lap since Josh left for work and before that he was following us from room to room sitting on the various soft surfaces he could find. Days like these are some of my favorites. When nothing is forcing you to leave the house and you can just catch up on the things that need to be done, today that means laundry.

I shared in my “Puppy Supplies 101” post that I make my own laundry detergent and I kind of just brushed passed it and shared the link to the recipe I use. And if you missed the recipe, here it is again, http://aprons-n-pearls.blogspot.com/2012/11/homemade-laundry-soap.html

Before I got married I had seen my mom make it once and after Josh and I ran out of our first container of liquid detergent, I opted to give it a try myself. Seriously, I will never look back!

This recipe makes SO much detergent that the financial savings alone are completely worth it to me. The first batch I made was when we moved into our Madison apartment at some point in late August. From that first batch, I was able to do roughly 3 (sometimes more) loads of laundry per week and we didn’t run out until mid-June! Isn’t that amazing! 10 months of laundry, 3+ times per week, and it only cost us about $20 bucks!

And the clothes get really clean. They smell so good that I don’t even kind of miss using a store bought detergent.

I made my second batch last week before we got Harvey, and marked on the jar I store it in the exact date, I cannot wait to see how long this detergent lasts us. So please just give it a try! You will be impressed; I am sure of it. (Besides, whipping it together takes less time than the multiple trips you would have to take to the store to replace your empty detergent anyways).

Intentional Despite the Craziness

When you get married your marriage has to become your number one priority, and trust me, there are a ton of things that go into making a marriage function. There are bills to be paid, household chores, balancing budgets, preparing meals, keeping the house stocked with food and toiletries, balancing family/friend relationships, and of course maintaining your relationship with your spouse, (And caring for anything else that breathes in your home, for us that’s Harvey).

This past week was a great reminder for me of just how intentional you have to be with making time for connecting with your spouse.

We picked up Harvey a little over a week ago and with that came big changes to our daily routines. Our mornings no longer consist of me sitting on the bed chatting with Josh as he prepares for work. We are feeding Harvey, letting him go outside, and trying to keep him from running off with a shoe. Last week, we also had several of our bills come in, a few things that needed to be signed and returned, vet appointments, work obligations, and your typical household stuff. Plus, we spent our whole weekend with family.

My sleepy boys on Sunday night

Sunday night, as we sat on the couch purely exhausted, I realized that I couldn’t remember the last conversation Josh and I had where the sole purpose wasn’t to get something checked off a “To-Do List.”

Sure it had been a busy week, but that to me isn’t a good enough excuse to let connecting with my husband fall by the wayside. Especially since I know life will be filled with busy weeks where things get absolutely crazy, and I refuse to let my marriage fall to the backburner.

So I brought it up to Josh, saying that I know we spent a ton of time together in the past week but felt like we hadn’t actually had a conversation. He agreed and we have decided to work on it together. We want to be able to connect even when our life gets nuts, and that’s important.

At the end of a crazy time in life I don’t want to look at my husband and realize I had been neglecting our relationship and be left trying to reconnect. I want us to be standing together at the end of craziness feeling like we didn’t skip a beat, but I know that we will have to be intentional about it.

Puppy Supplies 101

Before adopting Harvey, Josh and I spent a lot of time trying to figure out what we “needed” to do and purchase before bringing home a puppy. And of course there are dozens of online sources with lists of things they believe you need to have handy for your new puppy, but I have discovered some things that they forgot. For those of you who have not started figuring out what to get, I will include the basic stuff as well. In fact, let’s start there:

·         Collar- This seems like an obvious one, but it can be hard to get the right size before having your puppy with you. In my opinion, estimate. You need to be able to get them from Point A to Point B and the collar is necessary for that.

·         Leash- This can be your preference but consider your dog. If you are getting a big dog, chances are one of those retractable leashes will get broken right away. I prefer the good old nylon leashes.

·         Food- This is a tricky one because not all dog food brands are good and researching them is difficult with all kinds of conflicting sources. We used www.dogfoodadvisor.com to decide and chose Blue Buffalo.

·         Treats- For training/good behavior.

·         Bowls- You have to have a place to put their food and water.

·         Toys- Chew toys, stuffed toys, smart toys, I highly recommend a variety of toys and definitely a Kong brand toy. Puppies chew and the more of their own stuff they have to go after, the less likely they will choose your favorite tennis shoe. (Side note- don’t give them something that looks like something they can’t have, for instance a holey sock. Your dog isn’t going to realize you gave it to them because it had a hole and will go after your other socks).

·         Crate- Again, know your dog breed and estimate how big they will get since buying multiple crates can get expensive.

·         Dog bed- This one is again your preference. Most dogs demolish beds while they are puppies so it may not be worth the money until the chewing stops. We gave Harvey an old comforter that we folded up and an old pillow. So far, no damage so we may buy him a bed.

·         Car seat/seat protectors- If you want to take your dog places, do so safely and plan ahead. There are gates, seat covers, and even dog car seats so you can choose what fits your needs.

·         Soap- Your puppy may not smell super awesome after you bring him home or after outdoor play so pick up some puppy friendly soap.

Now for the things you may not realize you need:

·         Poop bags- Or some other way to clean up after your dog goes.

·         Laundry detergent- The day we picked up Harvey I made a huge batch of detergent (yes, made). Mainly it was because Josh and I were out, but I have done several loads of laundry because of Harvey having accidents, using towels after baths, or toweling him off after going out in the rain and mud. (Here is the detergent recipe: http://aprons-n-pearls.blogspot.com/2012/11/homemade-laundry-soap.html)

·         Paper towels- Accidents happen and if you have never tried to soak up pee from your carpet, you probably have no idea how many paper towels you will need. We went through a little over 2 rolls in the first week.

·         Carpet cleaner/floor cleaner- After your puppy has an accident you need to clean it really well so don’t get caught without cleaner. (If you have carpet be aware of the cleaner brand, some can bleach your carpet).

I hope you find this list helpful! I know that Josh and I have needed everything I listed at least once for our first week with Harvey. If you think I missed something, let me know! 

Harvey's First Week

Harvey is such a joy! Seriously, I can’t imagine a more perfect fit for Josh and I. He’s a playful and snuggly pup who has quickly found his way into our hearts.

The last time I talked about him, I shared with you some of our training experiences. Today, I want to share some of the adventures he has been on.

Deciding to not check out the water despite Josh prompting...

Josh and I live in an “outdoorsy” area. We are less than 5 minutes from Lake Michigan and incredibly close to bike paths, parks, and nature preserves. And since we want to include Harvey in as much as possible, we didn’t want to skip a beat in getting him acclimated to different things. (Plus, we want him used to the car so he doesn’t struggle when we go visit family). So this week we have been taking him with us whenever we can, even if it’s just a trip to pick up lunch.

Checking out the path

On Monday we took him to one of the beach access points nearby. Our thought was that it wouldn’t be crowded like the actual beach would, while still allowing us to expose him to the water. He came down the stairs and started walking in the sand, saw the water and decided it wasn’t for him. So we instead took him on a little walk on the path which exposed him to bikes, other walkers, and cars as they went by.

Tuesday, Harvey met his first little kid. We took him on a walk to the mail box (which is 4 buildings away in our apartment complex) and as we were heading back a little girl and her mom were just getting home. We saw he checking him out and offered to let her come meet him. He did fairly well, barked a few times and eventually hid behind me, but nonetheless he met her and made contact outside of Josh and I.

Harvey joining in on a workout

Wednesday was a big day for our little guy. He had his first vet appointment and took it like a champ. Harvey literally slept through his entire exam and the shot. Unfortunately, the shots made him sore so he lounged most of the day, but don’t think he didn’t make up for that at bed time when he turned into a little tornado.

Harvey at Lake Michigan

My favorite of his first week adventures was yesterday when we took him the beach. We figured mid-week and on a day that it wasn’t particularly warm, not many people would be there. And we were right. We got to let Harvey run on the beach and play in the sand. He even went in the water on his own!

It’s been a blast taking Harvey to try new things and watching him develop more of a personality. I can’t wait to introduce him to our families this weekend and continue exposing him to the fun stuff we can include him in on.

Apologize

Every once in a while, something warrants an apology. If you are like me, the smallest of infractions has you spewing out an “I’m sorry.” (And not in an ingenuine way). I believe it is incredibly important to say you’re sorry and acknowledge a wrong doing or misstep. And as part of my quest to be a Proverbs 31 wife, I find myself needing to say it a little more often.

Yesterday was a prime example of that. I was being a little moody and to be 100% authentic, I was kind of nitpicky and short fused with Josh before he left for work and again when he came home for lunch.

After he went back to finish off his day at work, I did a little online work and ended up on Pinterest (oops). As my “pinning” tends to go, I ended up looking at quotes and marriage articles, one which ended up reminding me of my Biblical call as a wife.

Almost instantly, vivid recall of the not so nice encounters I had with Josh came flooding into my head and I realized that my “attitude” was so not deserved. And since I am big on apologies, I really felt the need to make it right.

Because he was at work, I knew I would either have to wait for him to come home so I could apologize, or text him.

Well, texting doesn’t cut it for me (too impersonal) but I really didn’t want him to dread coming home to a cranky wife. So I opted to send him an email, (we tend to write letters to each other as sweet form of communication from time to time, I just modernized it for my need of instant delivery).

I wrote my email as if I was writing him a letter and detailed each incident I remembered being a less than loving wife and apologized.

Apologizing for me is so important because the hardest part is admitting when you messed up and owning it. No one is perfect, but ignoring a wrong doesn’t make for healthy relationships. Opening up yourself to admit a mistake makes a big difference. (And of course, follow it up with changed behavior).

Shortly after I hit send on my email, I received a reply. In typical Josh fashion, he made light of the situation by sending me a hilarious response. Because he was at work he emailed me as if he were addressing a client, totally made me laugh. Here is one of the lines from his response: “I look forward to future dealings in our marriage in perpetuity.” Isn’t he funny!

And he of course accepted my apologies.

So I guess, the moral of the story here is don’t ever be too big to admit you were wrong. Humbling yourself and asking for forgiveness is an important part of relationships. And I think that it’s important even for the small stuff.

Also, here is the article I was reading when I had my epiphany: http://www.kellycoxathome.com/75-ways-respect-husband/

Crate Training

Today’s post is much more difficult to write courtesy of Harvey.

No, he isn’t being bad, he’s actually being a little love-bug. In fact, the reason this is so hard to write is because he snuggled up next to me on the couch and despite the fact that I was already typing, proceeded to fall asleep on my wrist. So every tap of the keys moves his little head, but he is sleeping soundly through all the movement.

He's such a sweet boy!

Josh and I got super lucky with this little guy. We have only had him for a little over 3 days and he’s been such a joy.

It has been so fun watching him discover new things about his new home, and also learn how to manage his own body. For example, our apartment has hard floors and because he is so soft, when he sits down he spends most of the time trying to keep from sliding backwards.

I have also been loving his constant desire to be in our company and get cuddled. No matter what we are doing, he finds a way to wriggle his body close to ours. Whether its nap time on the couch or following us from room to room as we go about our day, he loves to be where we are.

Unfortunately, his constant need to be with us has also been the source of some training difficulty. Because he is still so young and teething, we have decided to crate train him. That way anytime we have to leave we know he isn’t getting into trouble.

As you can imagine, he isn’t fond of that.

Starting Monday, we worked on getting him acclimated. He would go in and check it out, grab whatever toy we put in there, and then quickly leave. If we locked the door, he would start to whine and then let out this horrendous round of barking. It was terrible. And according to everything you read, you aren’t supposed to let them out when they whine or bark because that teaches them to keep doing it until you cave.

So I hit the internet. I watched videos, read training blogs, and basically scoured for any information that would be the “magic bullet” to stop the barking.

Monday’s training didn’t go well, even though we only tried a few times and not for very long stints. (We live in an apartment and I am so anti being a bad neighbor with the obnoxious dog). But yesterday we had to figure something out because we are a part of a Tuesday night volleyball league.

I spent all day worrying about how we would break his barking habit and wondering how we would ever be able to leave the apartment together again. I tried multiple methods, interrupting the barking with a loud noise and giving a command, ignoring the dog while he barked, only giving attention when he was quiet, etc. Nothing was working. We tried 5 different times while Josh was at work yesterday and each time, I ended up feeling even more defeated.

Once Josh got home, we made another attempt. This time we would let him cry it out. We fed him dinner in his crate (like the trainers say to do) and left the room. Together we listened from our bedroom for 15 minutes until he finally stopped barking and crying. It was torture for me. But I couldn’t have been happier that he finally stopped. We let him out and rewarded him for being quiet.

Then came the real test, leaving for volleyball. Because I have this burning desire to not come home to hateful letters from neighbors, we decided that we would leave one phone on the counter and bring the other with us so we could make sure he wouldn’t drive our neighbors crazy for the hour we were gone. That way worst case scenario if he wouldn’t stop someone could come home and handle it.

As luck would have it, our little plan didn’t exactly work out. We listened to him bark for our entire drive and then somehow the phones got disconnected. All I could imagine was neighbors banging on our door (even though I ran into most of them during the day and told them we would be crate training and to bear with us and everyone was totally fine with it, in fact they said they hadn’t been hearing any barking. They were definitely lying to be polite).

Thankfully, when we arrived home an hour later it was silent in our apartment. Harvey had fallen asleep and didn’t even start his barking rampage again when he heard us come home. I was so happy! I know that the one time isn’t going to be the cure-all. And that he will probably have to bark it out several more times until he learns that we will come back, but it’s comforting to know he doesn’t carry on for the entire time we leave.

So hopefully, our training experience in the crate department is encouraging. I know it was helpful to hear from other people who said they had the same or similar crate experiences.  Now, hopefully our first visit to the vet goes well today… wish us luck!

Anniversary Year 1

I cannot believe it is already a week into June! 

This year feels like it has completely flown by. For those of you that don’t know, Josh and I got married on June 20^th of last year so we are getting close to our one-year anniversary.

Since typical milestone events (birthday’s and holidays) have been taking a back burner this year due to our crazy schedule and fluctuating finances, we have committed to making our anniversary special.

So after a little bit of going back and forth on the topic we have decided our anniversary will be a 2-part celebration.

Because the first anniversary is traditionally the “paper” anniversary, our plan is to book an event of some sort for later this summer or early in the fall. This may be a spa weekend, show in the city, or something else that gets us out of the apartment and trying something new and would come with a paper receipt or ticket. And we are booking it further out because we have our new puppy we don’t want to leave.

The second part will be the immediate celebration. The plan is to get dinner reservations at one of the fancier restaurants in a nearby town and treat ourselves to a wonderful dinner out where someone else will cook and clean.

What makes celebrating this anniversary special is the fact that Josh is totally into it. He is putting in serious effort to not be one of those husbands that “forgets.” He actually is the one who got the planning started, which is amazing since he is not the planner in our relationship.

I am so looking forward to celebrating our first anniversary and cannot wait to get started on year number 2!

Welcome Harvey!

So I have been waiting 2 weeks to share some really exciting news! Josh and I adopted a puppy! He is a black lab mix named, Harvey, and he has already completely won us over.

Right after his first bath at home

I don’t know if any of you have ever adopted a pet from the shelter before (and it had been a few years since my family adopted our family dog) but I had no idea how in depth the process was. Each shelter we looked at had an application that needed to be filled out which is pretty standard, while some of the shelters included background checks, requested references, and grilled you about your knowledge of canine diseases. Then some would do home visits, and visits with the actual dog, before making their decisions.

It was quite the experience looking for a furry family member, and to be honest, it felt like the process would take forever. If we found a puppy we liked, I was convinced it would be over a year old by the time the process was completed.

And then we stumbled upon the shelter we ended up adopting from. The owner of the shelter was awesome! She reviewed our application and approved us within 2 days. And she kept up with our emails and answered all of our questions. She even sent pictures and videos of the dogs we were looking at. (Which was especially helpful since her shelter was located in Tennessee).

He's already at home on the couch, munching on toys

Which is where we saw our boy Harvey. He was in one of the videos climbing on his siblings and the picture online was just too cute. Before we knew it, Josh and I were signing the contract and scheduling the pick-up of our pup. (The shelter works with a puppy transport that makes bi-monthly trips up to the Mid-West).

Then came the waiting game. Like I said, they only do transports bi-monthly. Josh and I spent plenty our waiting in and out of pet stores picking out toys, food, and dishes. And finally this past Saturday arrived and we were able to get Harvey.

He was tired from the journey but took to us really quickly and has already made himself at home. Harvey is such a sweet little guy and we are so happy to have his as a part of our family.

Loving his new bed and window view

If you are looking to add some fur to your family, I highly recommend adopting from a shelter. Josh and I went through Mercer Animal Rescue, but there are SO many other wonderful shelters who are taking care of pups who would make excellent additions to any family.

**Also, I wanted to add a disclaimer. Now that we have a puppy, you can expect to see more puppy related posts and adorable candid pics of our little guy.

Renting...

For the last year, Josh and I have been renters. If you’re up to speed on my blog you know that in the last year we have been in three different apartments, each bringing forth their own pros and cons.

When I was younger, I never wanted to rent. I didn’t see why on Earth anyone would want to throw money into something that wouldn’t amount to anything in the future. However, with our lifestyle and financial situation, owning a home was not something we were able to do right off the bat. And oddly enough, I am really happy about that.

Renting different apartments has taught us a lot about what we will look for and avoid in our future home.

For example, in our second apartment the bathroom set up made no sense. You could not easily open the cabinet because the door was in the way. And the storage options weren’t prime for taking advantage of the space. The main storage closet turned out to be a mountain of stuff we hid behind the closed door because it was too hard to organize things and make them fit well. (Don’t even get me started on the tiny kitchen).

But in our current apartment, (and my favorite thus far), we have ample storage and the kitchen is set up to have a wonderful flow. We actually can have our utensils and pans put away so that when prepping food, it all makes sense.

It has also been interesting to live under the rules of the landlord. Especially when it comes to decorating! Every apartment has a “no nails” policy which forces us to use those Command Hooks. In my experience those end up doing more damage than a tiny nail hole would have. (We have taken off our fair share of paint and even drywall because of them).

Renting has been an adventure. And one that I am actually glad to have been on. I love knowing that we have gotten to experience different layouts and set ups so in the future, Josh and I will be able to make wise decisions about what we want our house to be like.

And I because I am really proud of what we have accomplished since our move 2 weeks ago, here are some pics of our new place!